I appreciate this opportunity to practice in a structured way at home. The schedule is tight so it is a good training for me to apply mindfulness moment to moment in the home setting. It definitely pushes me to practice more diligently by myself at home.
From the sittings, I noticed I had many wantings especially in the morning sessions: wanting to relax, wanting to do good, wanting to apply the teaching, and wanting to stop the other wantings. These wantings were so pervasive that they were affecting my attitudes continuously. I can sense the wantings but I can’t remove them.
In the afternoon sessions, the grips of the wantings subsided. I was just in the state of being, being with the leg pain, being with the breathing sensations, being with the awareness and the thoughts. I was at peace with the present moment.
From this retreat, I can see how strong my inner urge is. Yet, it is not that formidable anymore because I have also experienced it quieting down. It is a continuous practice to let go the interference over and over again, not only during meditation, but more importantly, in real life situations.
Thank you, Rebecca, for providing a valuable retreat for us to practice.